Feeling Gravity's Pull

Last Saturday before the second op. A lovely microcosm of yesterday's "It's a Sin" post.

The boy had a short lie in. Just long enough for me to have coffee and finish off the blog. We watched TV for a while. I wanted him to use the potty. He did not. I lost.

Came downstairs. He directed me washing up and made me coffee. I got him to help me with some cooking for the first time. He stood on a little chair at the worktop as I made scrambled eggs and toast. He was very suspicious. I showed him breaking the eggs and whisking them. I tried to get him to pour in milk like he does for coffee. But he was only prepared for me to hold the milk and him to move my hand. May be another time.

The weather started to brighten, so he agreed to go out to the shops on the promise of buying the little milk with a flower on it (his own sign for a branded milk carton). But first we went to the post office to collect a parcel for me. When we went past the milk shop, he was furious and threw himself on the pavement, crying bitterly. I said we would come back but to no avail. So I had to carry him until he was calm enough to strap into the buggy.

He cheered up no end when we got to the post office depot as there were lots of post office vans. He was so excited pointing them all out to me - as if I couldn't see them. While we waited in the queue (outside) we tried counting them. He has just started to grasp counting but it's slow progress: "un" (one), "oo" (two), "ee" (three) and "or" (four) is as far as we get at the moment.

We did go back to the milk shop, where he wanted to get out of the buggy so we could share carrying the shopping basket. We did get the little milk. I didn't know what bread to get and was crouching down. He mimicked me squating down and rubbing his chin as if thinking.

We then went to a kids' clothes shop which has a little car ride in it. It was broken. But that was of no consequence. He happily played in it for half an hour. Sitting and driving it. Then getting out to inspect it. And so on. He played a bit with other kids, though said he was a little bit frightened of them. I was bored and wanted to leave. I told him to have a last go. Which he agreed. But when we left it was tantrum central again. Tears, throwing himself on the floor and beating his head with his hands. We left the shop, with what felt like the eyes of several mothers burning holes in my back.

He was tired and wanted to go home to Mummy. But at the last minute changed his mind when I suggested we go to a nearby cafe first. But he had a clear idea of what was required. I wasn't allowed to go to the cafe 20 yards from where I was standing but had to walk half a mile to the cafe in the park. I was very grateful for a sit down when we got there. He was happy stirring my coffee on a regular basis and trying to persuade me to have sugar in it (he likes the shiny little packets).

On the way home, we passed a local school which was having a Christmas Fete. There was a little roundabout ride. Having been on one similar in the summer he was very keen to go on it again. after his first go he wanted another and was choosing which little car to sit in. But in the middle of stepping into one, he stopped. He had seen another ride which looked more exciting. This was a ride with swing-type seats on chains that spun out as the ride went round.


He went on it three times, laughing excitedly each time. He looked so thrilled, excited and happy. An idylic moment. But another tantrum when I said we should go home. But home we went. His longest trip out since the operation.